Letter to J Crew.
Dear J Crew,
Here we are again. I just received one of your 20% off final sale coupon codes in my inbox. For me, it’s like a shining light – full of promises and potential, compared to my other emails, which consist mostly of spam from pharmaceutical companies in Canada. You tempt me with lovely textures, gorgeous colors, and the charm and sophistication that I crave. Nevermind that you’re a company for yuppies and bourgies. They obviously have good style sense. So I noticed that you’re starting to raise your prices, which means that the sale prices are higher also. This is probably the best for the both of us. Soon I won’t be able to afford you and we will part ways. Doesn’t mean I don’t want you badly, I just…don’t think it’s right for me to go with my instincts of buying now and thinking later. Don’t you agree? I mean, that’s what screwed so many people over in this economy in the first place.
Just know that it has taken me a lot of will-power not to order this from you:
or these:
and these…
and these…
and maybe these:
Nevermind that I almost never wear heals. I’m certain that if I buy one of these magical ones from you then I’ll be just like one of your models- cute, light & breezy, and perpetually happy. Alas, I am young, and it would be irrational of me to take from the pot that will go towards a down payment, our future family, and possible emergencies. So for now, I will have to quash my urges and find satisfaction from solely drooling over your beautiful pictures. I hope you understand.
Love always,
Sophia Q.
